Chapter 154: Florida Man Accidentally Wins "Mother-in-Law Prize" After Unintentionally Seducing His Wife's Mother
These once-menacing lamia-like creatures had devolved into little more than grotesque snake carcasses. Their bodies, while scorched and lifeless, still retained the eerie hint of humanoid curves beneath their reptilian scales.
"Evolved lamias, huh?" Felix muttered to himself, unimpressed.
With a sigh, Felix casually reached out and yanked one of the corpses from the pile. But the moment his hand touched the cooked flesh, the body disintegrated, crumbling into fine ash as though it had been turned to brittle sand.
"Great, just great."
Felix\'s expression didn\'t change, though he quickly opened his system shop and purchased a medical mask. He wasn\'t keen on inhaling stinky charred basilisk remains.
Undeterred by the mess, he worked systematically, dragging away corpse after corpse. Each one disintegrated with the same grim efficiency. The pile shrank bit by bit.
After a few minutes, Felix had cleared enough of the bodies to reveal the cave\'s true obstacle—a massive wall of ice, strangely unaffected by the surrounding heat.
The ice wasn\'t giving off the usual cold. In fact, it seemed to have absorbed the fire\'s heat, and its surface radiated warmth instead of chill. Felix inspected it closer, noticing burnt impressions where unlucky basilisks had been crushed against it during the battle.
Felix rubbed his chin thoughtfully, considering his next move.
"This isn\'t normal ice," he mused, narrowing his eyes. The sheer density and heat-absorbing properties made the ice wall something unusual, perhaps even magical in nature.
Then, an idea struck him. He quickly opened his system map, checking what Jiji had mentioned earlier—Diana\'s whereabouts.
His finger hovered over the system interface, scanning the usual threat map. Sure enough, inside the cave, a faint yellow dot blinked weakly. He zoomed in on the map, and a name appeared on the screen—Diana.
"Bingo," Felix muttered with a smirk. But his smirk faded slightly as he realized the logistical problem at hand.
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He had to enter this cave, but the ice wall blocked his path.
"This is going to be annoying. I\'m out of inventory slots… again."
He shook his head and brought up his inventory menu, scanning for any items he could quickly discard or drop temporarily. His plan was simple—store the massive ice wall in his inventory, clearing the path. But without any free space, that wasn\'t happening.
*RUMBLE*
Before Felix could act, the ground beneath the ice wall trembled. With a deep rumbling sound, the crystal-like structure began to sink, gradually vanishing into the cave floor. A path opened up before him as the obstacle disappeared on its own.
"Well, that\'s convenient," Felix muttered, relieved that he didn\'t have to part with any of his belongings. He stepped forward, entering the cave.
The atmosphere inside was cold, damp, and silent. The faint sound of dripping water echoed off the walls. As Felix walked deeper, the narrow passage widened, leading him to an underground chamber shaped like a dome.
The room had an eerie, ancient feel to it, as if it had been undisturbed for centuries. At the back of the chamber, a small pond of freshwater shimmered faintly in the dim light. The walls were littered with countless broken eggshells. Their jagged remains scattered around the floor along with the dead embryos.
In the center of the room sat Diana—the lamia queen. Her appearance was far from the powerful figure Felix remembered. She lay weakly on a cushion of hay, her body frail and pale. Next to her was a pile of shredded skin, evidence of her recent molting.
But despite her weakened physical state, Felix could feel the intense mana radiating from her. It was stronger, denser than the last time they\'d met, swirling around her like an invisible storm. Even in this fragile state, Diana\'s latent power was undeniable, surpassing that of Garudeer\'s.
Felix crossed his arms, taking in the sight.
"You\'ve been busy, huh?" he remarked with a casual tone, though his eyes remained sharp. He could sense that something had changed, that Diana was on the brink of transformation or perhaps something more dangerous.
Diana looked up at him with tired eyes, but there was still fire in her gaze.
"Felix," she rasped with a hoarse voice. "You\'ve come… just in time."
Felix raised an eyebrow. "In time for what?"
Diana let out a weak chuckle, her gaze shifting to the pile of eggshells around her. "You\'ve seen the automatic system messages, right? The demon god…my ancestor…has been reincarnated."
Felix, ever curious, raised an eyebrow. He wanted to see how much Diana knew about the situation. "So?"
"I suspect Zhu Xin Ci, or maybe a lamia from another tribe, is behind the resurrection. That\'s why I propose we join forces and work together."
Felix gave a slow nod. Her suggestion aligned with his goals, but an alliance like this couldn\'t be based on vague promises. There had to be structure—boundaries, clear terms, and mutually beneficial conditions to ensure the partnership lasted.
"And what do you need in return for your cooperation?" Felix asked, opting to address Diana\'s needs first. He knew that true partnerships started with acknowledging each other\'s desires.
Diana pushed herself upright, though her serpentine lower body still trembled, barely able to support her. It was clear that she was in no condition to fight or negotiate from a position of strength, but her voice remained steady.
"You\'ve already burned my home," she pointed out dryly, gesturing toward the charred remains of the forest outside the cave. "I need a new shelter... and food. Especially food. I\'m very hungry right now."
Her eyes flickered with a dangerous gleam as she added, almost instinctively, "In fact, my instinct is telling me to eat you."
Felix burst into laughter at her comment, unfazed by the thinly veiled threat. With a smirk, he casually ejected a kilogram of raw dragon meat from his inventory, holding it out to her.
"Before you eat me, how about I serve you the appetizer first, Your Majesty. This is dragon meat, raw."
Diana\'s eyes widened in shock as she stared at the offering.
But Felix wasn\'t done. From his inventory, he pulled out a large keg of spirit beer, still cold and frosty. He had been saving it for a celebratory drink, but now seemed like the perfect occasion.
"I\'ve also got some drinks. Eat slowly, I\'ll pour you some beer."
Calmly, Felix sat down in front of Diana, rummaging through his inventory for something to pour the beer into. Unfortunately, his search came up empty as he hadn\'t left any inventory slots for kitchen tools.
With an exaggerated sigh, he spent 20 years of his lifespan to purchase two glass mugs and filled them with the frothy brew. Handing one of the mugs to Diana, he raised his own in a toast.
"Cheers."
Diana hesitated, her hand trembling as she reached out to accept the glass. In her other hand, she took the chunk of raw dragon meat Felix had offered, bringing it to her mouth. As soon as she took a bite, her eyes widened again in disbelief.
"!!!"
Even raw, the dragon meat was incredibly delicious. She devoured it in minutes, savoring every bite before turning her attention to the mug. The liquid was golden, thick, and bitter, but strangely addictive. She downed it in one long gulp, licking her lips afterward.
"What is this drink, Felix?" she asked, staring at the now-empty glass with a mixture of awe and nostalgic.
"It\'s called BEER," Felix replied, smirking at her reaction.
"Beer? You can make beer in this world?" Diana\'s eyes brightened with an unexpected excitement, but her expression quickly softened into something more emotional. "No... I\'m an otherworlder, like you. I know what beer is, but…"
Her voice wavered, and suddenly, tears began to roll down her pale cheeks. She wiped them away, sniffling. "I never thought I\'d get to drink it again. I had already forgotten the taste."
Felix\'s smirk slowly faded as he watched Diana\'s emotional reaction. He had always sensed that Diana was someone unique, but seeing her tears, her vulnerability, caught him off guard. He had expected her to be tough, maybe even manipulative—but this? This raw display of emotion was something entirely different.
Gently, he leaned forward and said in a soothing tone, "Take your time, Your Majesty. There\'s no rush. Drink some more. I\'ve got an entire keg here, after all."
Diana\'s face brightened, her earlier tears replaced by a grateful smile. She extended the empty glass toward him, her voice light and almost playful. "Then, I\'d like a second, please."
Felix chuckled softly and obliged, pouring her another round of the frosty beer. As the golden liquid filled the mug, he decided to sweeten the deal by producing another hefty chunk of dragon meat from his inventory.
"And here\'s something else to keep you going," he said, handing it to her.
Diana\'s eyes sparkled as she gratefully accepted the offering. She tore into the dragon meat with renewed energy, savoring every bite as the two of them settled into a comfortable rhythm. Between bites and sips, their conversation flowed naturally, the tension between them slowly dissolving.
They began recounting the events that had led them to this moment—revisiting their individual adventures, their victories, and even the disasters they had narrowly escaped. Felix shared tales of his exploits, from the time he single-handedly navigated through plasma storms to building his floating domain.
Diana, in turn, spoke of her struggles as a queen, her responsibility to her tribe, and the painful choices she had made along the way.
"Remember the first time we met?" Felix asked with a mischievous glint in his eye. "Your people tried to ambush me. Didn\'t work out too well for you, did it?"
Diana laughed, her scales faintly shimmering in the dim light of the cave. "I wasn\'t even aware of your origins when Zhu Xin Ci tricked you, obviously. I thought you\'d be just another clueless wanderer. Instead, you turned out to be… well, you."
Felix smirked, leaning back. "Flattery will get you another glass, you know." He poured her a fresh drink as they continued to reminisce.
As the conversation wore on, Felix began to realize that despite their drastically different backgrounds, they shared a common thread. Both were outsiders in this world, forced to adapt and survive. Both had sacrificed much, and both knew what it was like to feel out of place.
Between sips of beer and bites of dragon meat, an unspoken understanding grew between them. They weren\'t just forming an alliance—they were starting to understand each other on a deeper level. For the first time, Felix saw Diana not as a monster or an adversary, but as someone who, like him, was navigating the strange, often cruel world they had been thrust into.
Diana\'s smile softened as she placed her empty glass down, her gaze thoughtful. "You know," she began quietly, "it\'s been a long time since I\'ve felt… normal. Since I\'ve had a conversation like this. I\'d forgotten what it was like… to be a human."
Felix gave her a sideways glance, his expression softening as well. "We\'re both in the same boat, Your Majesty. This world\'s a tough place, but maybe it doesn\'t have to be all bad if we\'ve got someone watching our back."
Diana nodded, her eyes meeting his. "You\'re right," she said softly. "Maybe together, we can make it a little less lonely."
"I\'m married, though. I also slept with your daughter."
"This world allows polygamy. How about some oyakodon-action?" Diana smirked.
"Don\'t tempt me."
Both Diana and Felix laughed, enjoying the conversation.
For a moment, there was a comfortable silence between them, the flickering light of the cave casting long shadows as they sat together. The walls of the cave seemed to close in, creating a quiet, almost intimate space where, despite everything, Felix and Diana had found a sliver of peace amid the chaos of their world.
Felix poured himself another drink, raising his mug in a casual toast. "To new allies. And better days ahead."
Diana lifted her glass in return, her smile warm. "To better days."
Through drinks and food, Felix and Diana agreed to form an alliance.
Next, they started talking about the housing — Diana\'s new home. Felix also asked for her cooperation regarding his goals.